“He hit his sister again”, my wife told me, “they were fighting over the remote”.
I’d just walked inside, and this conversation was part of our daily download – covered in last weeks post.
I was furious.
“Don’t deal with it now”, she wisely reminded me, “let yourself calm down”.
Early on in our relationship we decided that in our family, boys don’t hit girls.
It’s one of the things that define our family culture.
Adults learn their habits young and if it’s not ok for a man to hit a women, then it’s not ok for a boy to hit a girl.
The boy needs to find another way to deal with his frustration – and the parent has to help him process that.
This is called creating family culture – deciding what you want your family to look like.
As the parent, it’s your decision.
If you don’t decide – it will be decided for you.
Healthy culture doesn’t just occur – it’s created.
It’s never to late to start.
But it’s always hard.
When it comes to parenting, there’s nothing harder than creating culture.
That’s why most parents don’t do it.